FAQ

Your text is too small/big!
We attempt to ensure the readability of our site--unfortunately, at certain points it becomes a personal preference. In the case of text size, please look at the top of your internet browser, and you should see "VIEW". Change the font size. :) If you have a mouse wheel, CTRL+move mouse wheel works wonders.

I'm sorry, but do you have some mental disorder or something?
We might. It's too soon to tell. Sometimes we like to believe we just have sick humour, but who knows? Arget says we're just speshul.

What do you hope to achieve with this site, anyway?
Nothing in particular. While it may be nice to think that we can make some Eragon fans "see the light", the truth is, we're here more for people who believe what we do or need a place to vent their frustrations concerning this subject matter. Like so many people have said to us, "It's about Goddamn time!" Okay, I just added the cursing in there.

Why don't you get a life?
Well, that's a harsh thing to say, considering we're not dead. Next time you think that getting drunk and partying with your friends and then coming home to talk about who Paolini should marry and whether Eragon and Harry Potter will get along is something to brag about, though, well... *hands you a jug of bleach*

I still don't understand what you mean with [insert random quote here].
We usually get this type of question from people who don't understand sarcasm. If you're one of those...erm, well, let's see. You know when your best friend, let's say his name is George, suddenly shows up in pink spandex and says, "Isn't this the coolest thing ever?!" and you roll your eyes and say, "Sure, George..."? That's sarcasm.

Why don't you just spend time around people with the same interests as you?
But we do, my love! That's why this site is here.

I mean talk about the books you like, or whatever, losers.
We also do that. We don't just sit around and talk about Eragon hate for five hours, you know. We're Phantom fangirls/tarts, for instance. And anything--good books, movies, dogs, video games...you name it. It just so happens that we do particularly like working on this site, so--it's here to stay.

You do know that this site will just bring more popularity to Paolini, right?
Of course. But then after someone reads this site and buys his books anyway, that will be his fault then, right? If this site gives Paolini more popularity, then all the more power for him! We don't hate him THAT way you know. I mean, we don't spend all night stabbing a burlap doll with needles. Or at least most of us don't. NEXT!

What's up with Puff?
He had some pretty good shit. You can find out more about him when we put up the mascot section.

Are you guys virgins?
It's flattering that someone could think that a mere website is a call of attention for sex. In any case, the last time I checked, unicorns liked virgins better. As for the question--some of us no, some of us yes. It shouldn't matter though. What's more important is that none of us wank off to Elven porn.

Why don't you just talk about Lord of the Rings/Starwars?
Because some of us aren't die-hard fans of said books or movies, believe it or not. Paolini's writing is what matters more to us than whether he copied off these things or not. They're just added bonuses.

Instead of wasting time on this site, why don't you just write?
If you knew anything about writing at all, you would understand that you CANNOT do it at all times during the day. Fragon, for instance, downs a cup or two of tea at 2 am in the morning, writes for five hours straight, passes out, and then goes and updates the site sometime in the afternoon--so indeed, she does write, but she needs time to 'process' information and 'rest' her head. Apart from that, not everyone in this site is a writer. Some have other projects like films and such to work on, all of which, again, do not take up 24/7 of their time.

Why waste time on this site at all?
Why waste time RPing (and cybering) in the Shurtugal chatrooms? Honestly. It takes us a very short amount of time to cough up several pages worth of articles, simply because most of us can think and write fast. That said, who's to say what's 'time' being wasted or not? The fact that you spent time to ask this question at all, means you're not out there feeding starving little kids and nursing sick grandmas back to health.

Where's the graphics in this site?
They'll be coming along shortly. Our graphics team have either been kidnapped or lacks a computer at the moment. Since Anti-Shurtugal is fairly new, expect loads of updates and changes within the following weeks.

Why isn't your HTML spiffy enough?
Because our webmistresses are lazy and would rather stare at a picture of Gerry Butler for five hours than learn how to make a site properly. We like to fool ourselves into thinking "simple is beautiful".

Are you guys REALLY "Anti"-Shurtugal?
No. We're a parody/critique site.

What's up with Wicked?
Wicked is a "prequel" to the Wizard of Oz, with the story revolving around the Wicked Witch of the West, and is written by Gregory Maguire. It spawned a Broadway play in 2003, with Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel as the lead. Hackslayer is absolutely obsessed with Wicked and Chenoweth in particular.

What's up with this long FAQ? None of the fans are going to read it anyway.
You know, you got me there.